


Darryl's Dart Night

by needleyecandy



Series: Silly September [22]
Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crack, M/M, flatmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-12 10:18:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7930933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/needleyecandy/pseuds/needleyecandy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Darryl asked was that Thor put a sock on the doorknob. That wasn't so much to ask.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Darryl's Dart Night

**Author's Note:**

> Poor Darryl. He's suffered more than enough and yet I do this to him anyway.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Come on, come _on_ ," Darryl muttered as he rummaged through his knapsack for his key chain. There had been an accident ahead of him on the motorway that held him up by a full forty-five minutes, and if he didn't hurry up he was going to be late for dart night. It was his one night a week that he had been able to protect from Thor's intrusions and he wasn't willing to miss a single second.

The key was in the very bottom of his bag, as it always was when he was in a hurry, and there was a half-unwrapped sweet melted to the ring. He grimaced and ignored it, shoving the key into the lock and turning.

It took a moment to register what it was, exactly, he was looking at.

"What? Oh, no, Thor, no," he cried.

It was true that his flatmate was a god, and naturally enough had a godly arse, but it was still not the first thing Darryl wanted to see when he walked into his own home, right there before him naked and bouncing in all its divine golden glory.

Thor turned and looked back at him and that was even worse because he had this _look_ on his face that Darryl did not want to see now or ever.

"Hello, Darryl! Would you mind closing the door? There's a bit of a draft," Thor said.

Darryl closed the door behind him and ran to his bedroom, one hand up to block his eyes and the other trying, desperately, to somehow cover both ears at once. He was more than a little tempted to simply hide in there a while, but he'd already given up too much. He was not going to give up dart night and if he had to interrupt the sex life of a god that was just how it was going to be.

At least when he made his way back towards the door, dart sack slung over his shoulder, Thor had finished and was sitting on one end of the sofa, grinning down at his bitchy-looking sex partner, who was busy scowling at Darryl. A blue throw was keeping them mostly covered and Darryl decided to be thankful for small mercies.

"We talked about this when you moved in, Thor," Darryl sighed. "A sock on the doorknob is all I ask."

"Sorry. I got caught up in things."

"And also... wait, isn't that the guy from your board? The one in the mugshot?"

"Oh! Yes. Please, you must excuse my rudeness. Loki, this is my flatmate Darryl. Darryl, this is my brother Loki, second prince of Asgard and god of chaos."

"Nice to meet you," Darryl said faintly.

Loki gave him a brusque nod.

Darryl looked down and blinked. "Wait... is that my blanket?"

"You weren't using it," Thor pointed out.

"I was at work."

"Exactly. You weren't using it."

"My grandma made that for me," Darryl said faintly.

Thor ran his hand over it. "It's very nice. Your grandmother is greatly skilled."

"That's _so_ not my point. And why didn't you just use your own room?"

"It smells like meat in there," Loki said abruptly. "Also, his hammer is trying to take a nap."

"Late night," Thor explained.

"And she hates me."

"She doesn't hate you, she just doesn't know you like I do."

"Yes she does," Loki said with a yawn.

 _I bet it's why she hates him,_ Darryl thought.

As if on cue, Loki added, "It's _why_ she hates me."

It was strange to feel vindicated at such a moment but Darryl had been living with Thor for nearly four months now and he had learned to take what he could get.

"Would you mind running the blanket through the wash while I'm at darts?"

"Gosh, I would, Darryl, but I'm fresh out of change."

Thor always seemed to be fresh out of change on laundry day. Darryl put a stack of coins on the table. "Here you go."

"Alright. I'll go do it right now so it's got time to dry," Thor said, standing and letting the blanket fall away.

Darryl yelped and turned his back. "Could you put some clothes on, please? The building dress code..." The one that hadn't been needed until Thor moved in.

Thor chuckled amiably and there was the rustle of fabric. "All right, all covered up."

Darryl turned. "Are those my board shorts?"

"Yeah, they look really good on me, don't you think?"

"I'm probably going to regret asking this, but do you have any underwear on?"

"Nah, I'm fine. Just a little drippy."

"Oh my god," Darryl mumbled to himself.

"It's only a little spunk. Mostly lube. From my arse," Loki said.

"Loki! Darryl's a little shy," Thor scolded.

"Sorry," Loki said acidly.

"Anyway, you don't mind if Loki crashes here for a few weeks, do you?"

Darryl blinked. _Yes,_ he very much minded if Loki crashed there at all, but on the other hand, if he kept Thor busy (doing what, Darryl was determined not to think) it would be time that Thor left Darryl alone. "Do you mind if I think about it?"

Thor laughed and clapped him on the back, knocking him into the wall. "Good one, Darryl. Eh, Loki?"

"Riotous. Hilarious."

Darryl nodded and ambled forlornly down to his car. "Maybe it'll all look better in the morning," he told himself. And he actually managed to half-believe it, right up until the moment he got home and found a sock on the doorknob.


End file.
